Election Day.
I'm tired of writing about the wedding. That last post was just thick and unwieldy. I will give you this wedding tip:
If your wife asks you to do something, just do it right away because you don't want to be sitting in your underwear 90 minutes before your wedding trying to get a hold of your DJ to make sure he got the playlist.
But right now I want to talk about something else.
Today is election day. I think. I've never really cared or voted. The guy who sits in the cube to my left is apparently a politics freak and a degenerate gambler. He also talks to everyone and is a bit of a douche.
A couple of weeks ago, through one of his many talkings I learned that he is wagering on today's election:
"I've got a bet going that the Republicans take control of both houses."
I actually spoke at this point, just to make some pointless chit-chat: "You didn't make that bet online now, did you? We can't be breaking the law, now."
Him: "No, it's with a guy upstairs."
I figure it's just a friendly wager for something like $20.
Him: "So you gamble online?"
And so I told him that yes, I do gamble online. Specifically, I play poker and bonus-whore casinos, but the casino bonuses are basically gone and there are only a few poker rooms left. Also, I suck at poker.
I learned that he just fucking gambles. He bets on sports, mainly. I guess he also bets on elections. That's kind of interesting and sad. I find out later that his bet with the coworker is for something more than $20.
I forget about this until about a week ago. Then he asks me for some help:
Him: "You've got a Neteller account and know how that works, right?"
Me: "Uh...yeah."
Him: "Do you have a sportbets.com account?"
Me: "No."
Him: "If I give you $400 can you open a sportbets account and place a bet for me?"
Me: "?"
Him: "I'll give you 10% if I win."
Me: "Okay."
Apparently he met the limit on his account. He wanted to make a parlay bet that the Republicans win both houses. He was getting 6-1. I agree to make the bet for him.
He then hands me some $100 bills. I hardly know this guy and he's handing me $400.
I don't want to be an enabler and I don't really want the Republicans to control either house, but hey, I get about $250 if he wins and I lose nothing if he loses.
Go Republicans!
If your wife asks you to do something, just do it right away because you don't want to be sitting in your underwear 90 minutes before your wedding trying to get a hold of your DJ to make sure he got the playlist.
But right now I want to talk about something else.
Today is election day. I think. I've never really cared or voted. The guy who sits in the cube to my left is apparently a politics freak and a degenerate gambler. He also talks to everyone and is a bit of a douche.
A couple of weeks ago, through one of his many talkings I learned that he is wagering on today's election:
"I've got a bet going that the Republicans take control of both houses."
I actually spoke at this point, just to make some pointless chit-chat: "You didn't make that bet online now, did you? We can't be breaking the law, now."
Him: "No, it's with a guy upstairs."
I figure it's just a friendly wager for something like $20.
Him: "So you gamble online?"
And so I told him that yes, I do gamble online. Specifically, I play poker and bonus-whore casinos, but the casino bonuses are basically gone and there are only a few poker rooms left. Also, I suck at poker.
I learned that he just fucking gambles. He bets on sports, mainly. I guess he also bets on elections. That's kind of interesting and sad. I find out later that his bet with the coworker is for something more than $20.
I forget about this until about a week ago. Then he asks me for some help:
Him: "You've got a Neteller account and know how that works, right?"
Me: "Uh...yeah."
Him: "Do you have a sportbets.com account?"
Me: "No."
Him: "If I give you $400 can you open a sportbets account and place a bet for me?"
Me: "?"
Him: "I'll give you 10% if I win."
Me: "Okay."
Apparently he met the limit on his account. He wanted to make a parlay bet that the Republicans win both houses. He was getting 6-1. I agree to make the bet for him.
He then hands me some $100 bills. I hardly know this guy and he's handing me $400.
I don't want to be an enabler and I don't really want the Republicans to control either house, but hey, I get about $250 if he wins and I lose nothing if he loses.
Go Republicans!
posted by Brick at 8:14 AM
2 Comments:
If you're cheering for Republicans so you can win $250, you have hit rock bottom.
I had a make-dinner bet with Saher & Sam that the Dems wouldn't win both houses, but now I am the happiest bet loser ever.
Wait - back to that guy in your office - betting on the gops to take both houses is just about the stupidest bet you can make. It's not sports. Polls are a little more scientific than setting money lines. It was obvious the Dems would take the House.
No, I wasn't rooting for the Republicans. I meant for the last statement to be sarcastic. If you notice in the penultimate sentence I say: "I don't really want the Republicans to control either house."
I viewed the $250 as a consolation prize. You would have made the bet, too. Or would you have turned down the bet out of principle? Or would you have lied and just taken the money?
This guy was convinced he knew more than everyone else. "Those polls mean nothing," he said. He basically analyzed the situation in such a way as to convince himself the Repubicans were going to win, instead of looking at the obvious. I think he dropped a few grand on this.
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